Beam Me Up Scotty

When you are traveling around the country for a while, you get to experience unique and exciting adventures that your everyday workingman doesn't.  I had this rare opportunity yesterday.  I boldly ventured forth to a place I have never gone before: Wal-Mart on a weekday, before 5PM.

Yes, you heard that right, I went to Wal-Mart during the day.  Now this may seem like a small adventure to many of you, but you must understand a few fundamental truths about me:  1) I am from Minnesota, we do Target, not Wal-Mart, 2) as a general rule, I don't shop, unless it is for fishing gear or tools, and 3) I have been living in campgrounds for a while, not in large metro areas.

While on this strange adventure, I noticed an unusual and unexplained phenomena.  A disturbing number of the men walking around the store were apparently wired into the Matrix via these strange Star Trek like communications devices attached to their ears.  Several conversations with esteemed Ethnographers revealed to me that these devices are known as Bluetooth Headsets.  Apparently, with the aid of this revolutionary device, one can answer their cell phone faster than John Henry Holliday, D.D.S. drew his weapon one dusty October afternoon in southern Arizona.

While I can perhaps see the alleged benefit of this dubious device when one is shooting down the highway at 80 miles an hour, these guys were pushing carts in Wal-Mart at 3:30PM on a Wednesday.  I have to ask if this is really necessary?  Perhaps all these guys were Obstetricians on call with a 40 week first timer, or perhaps they were nuclear first responders, but more than likely, not.  Do we really need to be able to answer the phone that fast?  So fast that we can't reach into our pocket, pull out the phone, and press send?  Is every call so important that we can't risk not getting it on the first ring?

While I will confess that in years past I did own one of these devices as a part of my previously plugged in persona, I certainly didn't wear it to Wal-Mart (or more likely Rocky Mountain Anglers).  Eventually, it died a quiet death in a drawer somewhere when I stopped charging and using it.

As I have started to settle in to this journey I have come to analyze my relationship with technology a little closer.  How much is too much?  Which gizmos are actually helping me; actually saving me time, and which ones leave their promises unfulfilled?  While this might be a funny question for a guy who at times has sidled into motel parking lots on this trip to try to poach some free Wi-Fi, for me it has been a good one to ask.

Too often the tools become the point.  The information becomes the experience.  Too often I have looked at the clock after a quick visit to the internet to look up something to find that an hour is gone.  What else could I have done in that time?

Part of the goal of the Slow Lane trip has been to try to change our pace of life a bit.  Technology is a big factor in that.  Now that I know again that I can go for days without internet, computers, and cell phones without dying (like we did just a few short years ago), I do feel life's pace slowing down.  Rather than having instant information, communication, and connectivity at your fingers, you have instant experience and interaction.  Give it a try!  But mind you, it is not always fun and games.  Give yourself a goal of staying offline, off a computer, and off a phone for a couple of days.  Ask yourself how comfortable you feel.

Jim Harrison, one of my favorite authors, stated once that while everyone always says life is too short, he believes life is actually seven times too long and that the reason why people fill up their days with so much business: they are bored and don't feel the urgency of life.  While I don't think life is too long by any means, it definitely feels just a little slower and just a little saner when you unplug for a while.

So to those of you who were at Wal-Mart yesterday at 3:30, next time, live dangerously and leave the earbud at home.  You could even leave the phone there with it...

Then again, this could all be the crazy ranting of a guy who lives in an RV, drives around the country with no job and no schedule.  If so, Beam ME up Scotty.